Monday, March 10, 2014

a good stiff cup of coffee


The weather is warming. But still not enough for RL to feel comfortable opening up for an open mic. Sigh. OK, maybe next week….

Cara in to help us get ready for the weekend.

We’re having  a very difficult time communicating to Rachel that all of her stuff has to go. All of it. We’re significantly better, mouse wise, since the exterminators came, but we won’t really have it under our control until her things are gone. And she continues to deny any connection to what happened. And of course wants to lecture us abut what a serious mistake it is to cancel the mick, as she refers to open mic. All those disappointed young people I spoke to, they’ll never come back,she says mournfully.
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I wrestle a lot with the issue of mental illness. A considerable number of our neighbors who hang out here on a regular basis live with it at varying levels at varying times. And of course, when they are feeling threatened, or afraid, the emotions that go with that feeling are completely real and evidence of a profound depth of pain regardless of how objectively real their understanding of their circumstances is. The pain is very real and I can feel it. What’s most hard is being able to communicate what I am and am not equipped to deal with. To be able to say clearly that they need to see someone else, a professional. Which is true. But usually experienced as rejection. Very hard. As I say to Danielle after an extended discussion with Rachel, I need a good stiff cup of coffee…..

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