Creativity and a leg up

1/22

Jed Distler is a long time friend. For a solid year, back in the day, he was in residence at West-Park with Katherine and I turning out amazing liturgical explorations, especially with texts from the so-called gnostic gospels. And when we reopened, he was a major player in our concert for Andre, June of 2011.(Read this, it's important to remember:http://west-parkpress.blogspot.com/2011/06/bridge-to-restoration-its-not-about.html ) He’s part of the new music scene, colleagues with Milica, Carman, Jon Deak and Ralph. He’s ready to do a series here again . And interested in something special for Make Music New York. It’s great to think about working with Jed again.

Just as Jed was entering, a tall lanky guy, from  Texas, he says, comes looking  for help. Was here for his mother in the hospital. Has teeth issues (I can relate.) And starts rolling up his pants to show me his leg. Why, oh why do they do that?  Been to other churches. They tell him to come see us. I sigh. Say none of us keep money. Just can’t. Anything you get is personal. Just need $15 for my ticket , he says. He reaches for his pants leg again. I give him all I’ve got. Now I’ll have to go beg some more…he says. I say, Look at me…that’s all I’ve got…Bless you, man…that is all…

Thank you, God bless you, he says. And God bless you, I say.

 David L and Rachel are in to check out Mc Alpin. She’s got a birthday party scheduled for Saturday night. They come back amazed at how much work has been done up there. Amazes me, too.

Ryan is briefing me on social media. He’s worked out a pretty good strategy. But unfortunately is working full time and no table to do it. His partner Sam, however, just maybe…

The Dzieci are gathering in the sanctuary. The Open Choir heading to the gym. I’m on my way downtown to see Russ’ play at La Mama, Cedars…all I know is that it has a Native American theme. Even though I give myself an hour for a 30 minute trip, two unexpected subway delays leave me 15 minutes late. No late seating. None. So I’m screwed. Make the long trek back from the East Village to the Upper West Side.

There’s a Grotowski confluence of Dzieci and Work Center Open Choir people, all leaving the building and out to the sidewalk at the same time. Mario, as always lingering for conversation inside. Time to wrap up. Close the doors. Go home.

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Marissa Provenza: just people she loved...

10/6

Thanks to my cousin Suzanne and her son Gordon, we are able to quickly replace the stolen computer. Family, extended communities, that keeps us going.

The police come to interview me about the old one, the one that’s gone. Two uniformed police. Male and female. Friendly. I tell the story again. Slowly. For the third or fourth time. And yes, we are working on the security cameras.  Saturday, I visited the precinct detective squad and spent an hour going through mug shots on a computer. Pretty depressing. Went through nearly 500 photos. All looking, angry, anxious, depressed, defiant, broken or….Only 3 or 4 were maybes, the other hundreds clearly no. But the faces haunted me.  RL, of course asked me, what did I expect? Smiles?

Geoffrey is asking for a blanket. It’s getting cold out.

Jeremy and Anthony are the first to arrive to start putting things together for Marissa’s memorial service. Marc has quickly agreed to do the sound on short notice...

                                                           * * * *

Marissa

Marissa Provenza was a  member of the Seed Group. She came every Monday to sing with the Work Center Seed Group singers. They gathered to sing the African -American and southern white songs that are the roots of spirituals and gospel. They said she didn’t want to sing out too much, but everyone heard her voice, felt her presence. She died last week, suddenly. Unexpectedly. Tragically.

Jeremy G contacted me about the group coming together to plan a memorial service for her. Could they use the sanctuary? 
Of course. That’s why we’re here. 
The Seed Group is part of the family.  They’ve asked me to open and close the service. As people enter, they plan on people being greeted with a eucharist of  popcorn and prosecco. There will be a slide show. Music. Later, a video. And a potluck following.

As we are preparing, the parents arrive. From Florida. They tell me they were raised Catholics but became Christians in the ‘90’s. Today they are more spiritual than religious, but they assure me that Marissa knew Jesus.  More an affirmation of who she is than any thought that I needed to know that.

The people keep coming in, the pews keep filling.  The numbers are moving to me. Most from that 25-40 age group. Many from the circle of communal community houses in Bed-Stuy where she lived.

I’m paying attention to details. The altar.

The altar

Photos. Flowers, Remembrances. Poems. A small Mexican craneo. A San Lazaro candle from Latino popular culture. Votives.

Time to begin. I share some traditional words. ….my peace I leave with you…not as the world gives…blessed are those who mourn…for they shall be comforted.. Welcome them all, say that as her voice sang in these walls, it is still here. As theirs will be. And I quote the Dead:

If my words did glow with the gold of sunshine
And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung
Would you hear my voice come through the music
Would you hold it near as it were your own?
It's a hand-me-down, the thoughts are broken 
Perhaps they're better left unsung
I don't know, don't really care 
Let there be songs to fill the air

And said may your songs, your words, your prayers, fill this air…

I listen closely over the next two hours. To the original songs. The deep, probing spiritual questions they ask, affirmations they make. The poems, spoken word offerings.  One of her favorites, Don Mc Lean’s Castles in the Air.  A singer breaking down, unable to finish Leonard Cohen’s Bird on a Wire. ... and I swear by this song, and by all...by all.... A rousing group sing of another of her favorites, the praise song, Our God is an Awesome God:

Our God(our God) is an awesome God
He reigns(He reigns) from heaven above
With wisdom(with wisdom) pow'r and love
our God is an awesome God…

Testimony after testimony to a woman who embodied unconditional love. No acquaintances, they said, just people she loved. Who drew the bitter and cynical in from the edges. People who knew they had been loved.

The parents were amazed by the number of people. The life of their daughter given witness to.

I been changed...

The Seed Group gathers in a circle, takes off their shoes…starts to sing, I been changed….and the circle grows and the dance goes round and hands clap in rhythm, voices raised in harmony…

And then it’s my turn again. I begin with the  23rd psalm. The Lord is my shepherd... I was expecting a lot of why to be in the air, so I spoke of how my good friend Father John says it remains a mystery. And that at moments like these, God is shocked, surprised. But that he is equally sure that God is there on the other side, waiting with open arms to say, Welcome home with a warm embrace…I say the traditional words of commendation, …ashes to ashes, dust to dust…yet even at the grave…alleluia, alleluia, alleluia….

The chanters come forward, including some who sang Awesome God with one hand upraised, kneel before the altar, Nam myoho renge kyo, nam myoho renge kyo…until a bell is rung…

Anthony, who has been painting throughout the memorial, shares his finished work with Marissa's father.

Anthony's painting

And then, as people move to embrace each other, a lone harmonica plays Amazing grace….

People join together in the breaking of bread. Sharing of food from vegan to barbecue ribs.

Hold your life dear. Live your life. Love your life...
In the name of the living one who created us, Jesus the human one who walks with us as brother,companion and guide, and the wild and untamed holy spirit that sustains us, Amen…

                                         

                                                             ****

I was moved by what they had woven together from who they are. From their souls. Uncensored. Unfiltered. Unmediated. I was ready for why, but not so much of that. Yes, profound sadness. For some unspeakable grief. And the inevitable anger. But more acceptance than why. With all that accepting that means.

These 200 or so young people were for this night a true spiritual community. And my question of course, is who am I? Who are we, as church, in relation to this reality? Do we have any other role than that of a chaplaincy of accompaniment? Do they need anything from us other than a space to be together? Why was it important to be in a holy space? A church? What do we have to offer? All I know is it begins with presence….

After Mario and the Grotowski Work Center brought the Seed group into being, and Mario returned to Italy, I challenged Jeremy

Jeremy

and the group to see if there was a true community in formation. They have done that, rooted in song and spirit. My challenge has been to see where that can go..

I’m thinking of my conversation with Kristen Leigh…so why do we need church? And her answer, It comes down to what’s there when the shit hits the fan…what can I count on….The Seed Group met that challenge.

Again, what is the call here? All I know is that it begins with presence…

                                       ****

Interfaith Assembly pin

Uh, thanks for Ripple, someone says, that blew me away...
Pretty close to perfect lines, I say. Outside on the steps, a neighbor is talking to one of the friends. He’d seen an open door, walked in to

see what was going on. Another I’ve lived here for years, never been inside before's….The friend says, This place is coming back…he points to my Interfaith Assembly pin with the four quadrants, cross, crescent, Buddha, star of David…that’s it, he says….

I’m concerned about the clean up, the remains of the potluck. I see Jeremy. He says, I was worried too, but Marissa believed strongly in recycling, in respecting the environment. Her friends got this covered…

Pat O has stopped by. He looks on, intrigued. 

Open Choir ...and questions

7/23

Open Choir

Jeremy G and Lloyd are in working out details for tonight’s  Open Choir and screening.

I’m having a conversation with Thomas B who conducted the orchestra for Milica’s Composers’ Concordance (http://www.composersconcordance.com/) festival last year at West-Park. He’s coming  back to the city, looking for work, community. Another outlaw musician as it were. I wish I had a large enough congregation or….I’ll think about this. Must be a way to work him into this.

TK is working with Marc on sound for the Hiroshima event. RL’s asking questions, looking for answers. Too much going on at the same time.

The Open Center’s Open Choir is in session. At least 40 people in a circle, singing songs from the African-American church tradition. It is Christian music, but non –sectarian, the singing transcending boundaries. Katherine calls it a contained ecstatic experience without context, but nevertheless, something is happening.

There is a screening of Action at Aya Irini, a performance by Mario and the Work Center outside of Istanbul in an abandoned basilica. An extended performance of a text from the Gospel of Thomas in Coptic, which they translated themselves. Dance, song, theatre, performance.

The music is set to a sampling of these texts:.

1. And he said, "Whoever discovers the interpretation of these sayings will not taste death."

2. Jesus said, "Those who seek should not stop seeking until they find. When they find, they will be disturbed. When they are disturbed, they will marvel, and will reign over all. [And after they have reigned they will rest.]"

3. Jesus said, "If your leaders say to you, 'Look, the (Father's) kingdom is in the sky,' then the birds of the sky will precede you. If they say to you, 'It is in the sea,' then the fish will precede you. Rather, the (Father's) kingdom is within you and it is outside you.

When you know yourselves, then you will be known, and you will understand that you are children of the living Father. But if you do not know yourselves, then you live in poverty, and you are the poverty."

4. Jesus said, "The person old in days won't hesitate to ask a little child seven days old about the place of life, and that person will live.

For many of the first will be last, and will become a single one."

5. Jesus said, "Know what is in front of your face, and what is hidden from you will be disclosed to you.

For there is nothing hidden that will not be revealed. [And there is nothing buried that will not be raised.]"

After all, there is nothing hidden that will not be revealed, and there is nothing covered up that will remain undisclosed."

Jesus said, "Have you found the beginning, then, that you are looking for the end? You see, the end will be where the beginning is.

Congratulations to the one who stands at the beginning: that one will know the end and will not taste death."

19. Jesus said, "Congratulations to the one who came into being before coming into being.

22. Jesus saw some babies nursing. He said to his disciples, "These nursing babies are like those who enter the (Father's) kingdom."

They said to him, "Then shall we enter the (Father's) kingdom as babies?"

Jesus said to them, "When you make the two into one, and when you make the inner like the outer and the outer like the inner, and the upper like the lower, and when you make male and female into a single one, so that the male will not be male nor the female be female, when you make eyes in place of an eye, a hand in place of a hand, a foot in place of a foot, an image in place of an image, then you will enter [the kingdom]."

But meanwhile they are drunk. When they shake off their wine, then they will change their ways."

They said, "Otherwise he can't do it."

106. Jesus said, "When you make the two into one, you will become children of Adam, and when you say, 'Mountain, move from here!' it will move."

That Thomas again, coming from that other place. The other Christianity we are only now discovering. It’s a moving film. Except that the projector keeps overheating and stopping.

But I keep pondering. What is the connection? How does this work connect to building a new church? How does this become a community of mutual commitment? Accountability? Service? Maybe we’ll get close to that tomorrow night in our conversation. Bug the question continues to burn inside of me.

Visit RL to hear about a hard week. Talk turns to Fred Neil. Songwriter. Lover of dolphins. Best known for Everybody’s Talkin at Me from Midnight Cowboy. RL introduces me to A little bit of rain…(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYl5v5OV_y8)

As I leave, Marc is in the sanctuary screening  an old movie about Frank Sinatra…projector seems fine….