3/29
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| RIP DeJuan |
So how do we distinguish a weekend? As I thought about that, I realized that the online consulting work I’ve bene doing is in fact, work, and I could commit to not doing any work on the weekend, just to have some semblance of a weekend. Although I did take tine for the AIDS network meeting on Saturday afternoon, I won’t do anything more with that until the weekend is past.
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My friend and sometimes singing partner Steve has not been feeling well. He had a slight fever and…He seems to be better. But. Going to do a full quarantine for two weeks. This afternoon he does a special “American Songbook” show where people can send him requests and he will play and they can “perform.” His audience is having a tough time with the American Songbook concept. No Carpenters. No Carol King. He does do a song of mine written in that piano jazz/cabaret vein, “I’m Not in Love.” The second time around, I choose “Blue Skies,” just like we recently did in Florida. It’s a nice break.
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| American Sing Book singers at Rudy's, Lake Worth, Fla. |
After the song session, he hosts another of his “BS” sessions. Most participants are from Florida, where he winters. Among the topics is a longish exploration of natural home remedies for the virus. I always find these somewhat annoying starting with the assertion that they actually work. I always feel that ok, if this really works, why isn’t Gov.Cuomo telling us? And there’s always a sense of establishment medicine’s prejudice against natural remedies and semi-secret knowledge. I think believing in these is a way to convinced ourselves we can have some control in a situation where everything seems out of control. And sometimes they actually work. Finally the beaches in Lake Worth have been closed. But the Governor of Florida has been very slow to act.
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Another cold and wet day to be outside.
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The Sunday night We Love Songwriters Open Mic has its second virtual session having debuted last Sunday. (So glad all of today’s on line sessions have worked.) I’m trying to pull together another virus song, but am not quite ready so I’m happy when CC asks to sing my tongue in cheek Open Mic Lament (Read the Room). We spend as much time talking with one another as we do playing which we don’t normally do when we’re at Bar 9, our regular Sunday night spot where Lin Manuel Rivera’s Love Supreme Freestyle tried out their Broadway material and where Cecily Strong has more than once been in the audience. I’m getting to know my colleague singer-songwriters better than I ever have. So there is that.
3/30
It’s a warmer day. On my walk, on the edge of the park, I find a makeshift memorial for someone named DeJuan. Was it CoVid19? It’s not clear, but there are now over 1550 CoVid19 deaths in New York. Yes, people are dying. It’s real.
My old West Park Church is having a Bible Study based on my recent blog on Psalm 23.There are some glitches getting started, but it comes off. At 7 PM, we hear from one person’s window the nightly cheers for medical workers on their way to the hospitals. (While the workers appreciate this, what they really need are masks and equipment.) There’s a feeling that things may/will never be the same. Most of us are over 70. Not in my lifetime, says Russ. It’s been a very clear sign that the way we’ve been doing things globally just doesn’t work. But do we have the creativity and will power to do what is necessary? We vacillate between hope and despair. Some in the group are frustrated by the “younger generation” but I see a lot there. We do feel the shadow of death surrounding us, we’re all closer to the end the the beginning. It is sometimes hard to believe that God is truly with us, that we are being protected. For most of us, it’s not so much death we fear as the complete breakdown of society. We are also aware that the disease is not an equalizer, that for many it is is such worse. Especially the homeless population. I now learn that the shelter.we volunteer and serve a meal at the first Sunday of every month has closed. We will not be serving next week. What has happened to all these women?
The songwriters workshop meets again. Probably over half the songs offered are efforts to deal with the virus. That’s what we do. Some are cynical, Some satiric. A strong sense of anger, even bitterness. I’ve been trying to repurpose a song for the virus. This is what I came up with:
Everything’s Going to Be Okay (coronaversion)
We live in a season of virus in the air
Keep your distance, don’t touch, better beware
We live in a season of staying inside
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
And I knew my troubles ain’t no worse than yours
But troubles are still troubles that’s for sure
How are we supposed to make plans my friend?
Are we closer to the beginning, or the end?
They say this is a “strange and confusing time”
I keep checking, but I’m feeling fine
How to understand, how to make sense
When keeping apart is the best defense
What am I supposed to understand
About a virus everywhere in every land?
Until the day when we’re set free again
I miss the touch of lovers, touch of friends
I step outside just to ease my mind
Look around in there, not sure what you’ll find
I try real hard not to get depressed
Try real hard not to give in to the stress
I look up the street and what do I see?
An old man leans on his cane looks up at me
Says “son, I just got one thing to say.
Everything’s gonna be ok”
Not sure if I believe him but it sure felt good to hear him say
Everything’s gonna be ok.
We live in a season of virus in the air
Keep your distance, don’t touch, better beware
We live in a season of staying inside
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
Still I believe everything will be ok
Maybe enough for another day
Maybe just enough for today
My friends say, but it is not going to be ok. And you do not believe it. And the more I think about it, the more I know they are right. I don’t believe it. I need to reflect and have another go at this….
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